Recently I have had some clients who approached me for coaching. I’m slowly learning that I cannot work with everyone who comes. Why not?

Coaching works because of the process, which is based on adult learning theories.

Coaching helps coachee gain clarity on thoughts and actions that are required to attain the set goals. This Forbes article very nicely describes the neuro-process that occurs in a coaching process.

For coaching to work, first, the coachee needs to have the desire for the change.

Then they need to feel the need for a change.

Then, they need to be able to commit the time to take action toward the goal.

For example, if I wish to get a new job, first I need to have the desire for that, e.g. ‘I want to make more money’. Then I need to have the need for that ‘I need to make more money so I can pay for a bigger apartment for my growing family.’ Then I need to be able to commit the time e.g. ‘I am committed to allocating time every day at 6-7pm to work on this goal.’

After all that, I am now ready and open to co-create some solutions with my coach in the coaching session, e.g. look at job descriptions, meet new people etc.

A typical coaching cycle: coaching session -> coachee does the tasks -> report back & track progress in coaching session -> more tasks -> coaching session etc

After knowing what needs to be done, the coachee allocates and spends time carrying out the tasks that have been established from a session. That’s why there needs to be gaps between sessions. I would say 70% of coaching happens in between sessions. That’s also why coaching is a process that takes 6-12 months for change to happen.

The common tasks are affirmations, reflection, writing down answers e.g. values, beliefs, goals, strengths, empowering paradigms, reading, preparing answers for interviews, making presentation speeches, consciously changing the way they interact with people etc.

Coaching is a partnership that without effort from both the coach and coachee, it wouldn’t work.

Further reads:

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